freestyle

2009-03-04T06:38:00.000-08:00

JEUX D'ENFANTS MY ASS

I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT

2008-05-22T06:01:00.000-07:00

hello everybody, yes i have decided to blog again. supposed to blog once a month but i kind skipped off in April. thank god i made it in may even though it's close to the end of it. i didn't blog earlier for a variety of reasons, biggest of them being jc2 life, and trust me it's not because it's boring. more of a lack of time then anything else.

one thing that was awesome about this month was the many concerts and games that i went to. seriously i nvr imagined that i would go for a dance concert or a band concert. if u know me u know i'm not a very dance/concert band sort of person. the only dance i like watching is break dancin, the only band concert i would go for is a rock concert. however going for those concerts really made my month. they were AWESOME and a huge shout out thank you to mei yi and jh for inviting me and doing their best to convince me to go despite me being very broke. dance concert was really great, even though i admit i can't really judge dancing standards considering don't know shit about contemporary dance. but i would give it 110 for entertainment cuz it was one of the most entertaining dance performances i hav ever seen. jh was really cool and the dance the he choreographed was amazing. hope i get to see u do ur moves again dude. though kinda sad that lois fell sick and couldn't make it, will try to get u the dvd k?

band concert was a bit more recent, yest night. at first i really didn't want to go cuz like i said earlier i wouldn't pay money to watch a band perform if it wasn't a rock band. but i'm really thankful that mei yi kept on bugging me to go cuz it was really great. our vj band is really good and I'm kinda sad that this is the only performance of theirs that i've actually attended. VJCB ROCKS!!!

MUSIC FEST:) nearly forgot about this awesome concert. u know it feels very different when u attend it as the audience instead of a performer, significantly more enjoyable trust me. i admit that the soloists were not as good as last year. the groups were awesome. october's lost really deserved that win, they were awesome. though i was really upset that my old band didn't win, they deserved to win with their song and their performance.despite the messed up acoustics of the pt they still managed to deliver unlike that other bands. sadly they lost to dani california, i guess the judge liked rock music better. don't worry peeps, everyone think u guys should hav won, because u guys were awesome. u did ur best and delivered an awesome performance. can't wait to play with them again after As:)

though i feel really sad that i missed the choir concert, didn't get to see mellie,des or jeremy perform. cherry made me mug at home, sucks man. hope they have something on later in the year that i can go for...

ok that's the end of my post, may really changed my view towards life a little. we can't always say no to things that we've nvr tried before or nvr thought about tryin. should just give it a shot and who knows...u might actually like it. life is roller coaster ride...just gotta ride it. who knows u might hav the ride of ur life:)

2008-03-25T07:13:00.000-07:00

u know it is simply amazing what sec1 guys do with their free time,was doin econs hw at home when this msg popped up in my phone, coutesy of luke from ye:

"I hate ppl hu type in shortforms.I tink dey shud b shot we mst write in prper wrds or we will fail eng.so frm now on huever i catch not typng prper eng wil b shot."

not really sure how many points it should get for funny but most definitely it has got to get a 100 points....for entertaining my day (when u're stuck doing econs, anything is entertaining)

man i really miss being that free and having absolutely nothing to do with my life, as boring as that might actually sound:P

2008-03-07T22:25:00.000-08:00

after much persuasion and much prodding, yes i am going to update. u know sometimes we feel that we are doing things just for the sake of doing things, well sometimes i feel that blogging is one of them. yet strangely whenever i actually feel like blogging my thoughts, the world takes me away from that. someone once told me that in life it's not that we don't have time to do things, it's more that we just have to make time. that's the big problem isn't it, making time.

results for a levels was just released yesterday.for the whole day that is the only thing on everyone's minds, from the teachers to the students, to even the security guard outside my sch. even our only lesson of the day, econs by mr lum, was spent talkin about results, talkin about how just one year from now it would be us sitting in the hall anxiously waiting for results. as i watched from the gallery of the sch hall at 3, i wasn't really lookin at my seniors. instead is was lookin at the j2s who were lining the galleries lookin at our seniors below. the same thing probably popped into everyone's head, next year it will be our turn, just one more year and we will be all sitting in the hall wearing our home clothes listening to mr chan talk...and talk...and talk..oh and talk. i was with the air rifle guys and lookin down at the hairless heads, we were all wondering about the same thing...i wonder how i'll look without hair.

no forgetting the constant reminder that we are getting old. just last sunday i was remindered again about how old i actually am, this coming from an 18 year old teen. jeanette left for australia, being a sec 2 student must be quite difficult for her to leave singapore to go to another country. durin ye we all prayed for her. durin the prayer people started cryin and at the end of it i looked around and those who were cryin and lookin sad, it was all the kids. from the sec4s to the sec1s. yes i didn't feel a single thing. sure i would miss her, but i wouldn't miss her like the younger kids would. then i saw jon and paul and realised that we were all thinkin the same thing, thinking about how when we were their age and someone from our batch was leavin, we would be feelin the same things they were feelin. yet now we didn't feel a thing, more jaded then anything else. i said man i feel old and they nodded their heads in agreement. yes i'm an 18 year old boy and shit i feel that i'm gettin old, how ironic is that.

back to the point about results, i think that no matter what results u get, sure u might be happy or sad after a while, but after that "a while", u won't be feelin a thing. that's because it is just a result, just letters on a piece of paper. u might want to get good results for your career, to prove to someone else or yourself that u are worth something, to feel good, but in the end ultimately u are not the results that u get. i know of people who do amazingly well but yet when u meet them u would think that they were just any other normal guy, to the point that u can take the whole image of the geeky dude in the lab coat out of the window. ultimately your results are not what makes u. u're don't have better moral values because u got an a in physics, it doesn't mean that gettin an a in gp because u wrote an amazing essay on the decadence of society that u won't be snorting drugs up your nose the next day.

in the end u are who u are, and results don't have shit to do with it.remember that

smile :)

2008-02-05T06:39:00.000-08:00

have u ever felt that as u grow older and older, time seems to just pass u by. in like a split of a second and poof, i'm onto my next step in growing old. it's as if just yesterday i was 16, young and free. ok not really free i admit. with age after all comes responsibilities and duties that u have to fulfill. yet one cannot deny the perks of ageing. more independence, the seemingly growth in wisdom, wider choice of activities to do when u're bored. for years i have been pretty jaded with getting olded, yes jaded is one way to describe it. yes u might think that i am a little too young to be jaded about ageing but yes i get jaded. it is as if i am getting older and older but nothing seems to actually change.

yet today i was remindered that i don't need to be jaded. it is not just something that happens year in and year out. it is not just a day every year that simply happens. it is a time when u are remindered that even though u truely don't give a damn about your own birthday, other people actually do. and that is truely what makes birthdays so special. celebrating with the people u love, people u grew up with, people that i like to call...friends.

thanks to everyone who made this day special for me. was really nice of u all to do this for me, and i truely appreciate it alot. thanks to my batch of churchies - was really surprised since u guys nvr really did anything like this for me before- thanks to my classmates - who sang the birthday song like 8 times and really turned my face red with embarressment - thanks to lois -the song really made my day:) - and thanks to my bros, u guys are awesome.

one year older, one year wiser...and one year happier:)

2007-12-27T22:45:00.000-08:00

this is either too early or too late to do the much cliche reflections for the year..but one thing that I have learnt this year is the time waits for no man...and neither does 2008

the past year has really been a rollercoaster ride for me, though not many people might know about it. Have had alot of good memories this year, yet at the same time there are the bad memories that will forever haunt my soul. 2007 for me was a year of lessons, I've learnt alot of things this year. Maybe it's becuz of the transition from sec sch to being in a jc, or maybe it's the transition from 16-17. I have learnt alot about both myself and about the people around me, all of the good...the bad..and the ugly.

As i sit here in front of the computer reflecting about my life, I am remindered about my own mistakes, my own sins. Maybe that's what reflecting is about, remembering what u have done and learning from them. Yet I look at my mistakes of the year and I realise, the mistakes are the same as those that I have made before. Is it true that we are fated to commit the mistakes of the past? That somehow we can never escape from them? With hindsight all things suddenly become clear.

Hahaha, here i am thinking of only the sad stuff, what happened to all the good stuff? Have made many good friends this year. Have had many memorable experiences, some unforgettable. Planetshakers concert was a turning point for me, though prob not for the reason u think. Sentosa was memorable, class chalet was memorable, hanging out with the arc people was memorable. YE Camp for all the mess ups that happened was also very memorable. Can't really get the memory of the sec3 guys waering hairbands our of my brain, I wonder whether there is a pill for that. Music Fest was very memorable, having an outlet to just play music with your friends is definitely something that I will always cherish. Though I was thinkin of maybe doing something different this year. Havin the guys over at my place just to hang out was fun, and I still have ak's xbox in my house...better return it to him soon:P

Another thing that I faced this year was change, everything changes. Ironic as it might actually be, the only thing constant in this world is change. The fact that the world will always change, that everything in your life will always change is probably the only constant thing that u will face. As much as we might hope that somethings will not change, they do. Yet the truth is that it is not things that change, it is we that change. Relationships change, the way we see the world changes, the music that we listen to changes. Somethings change for the better, others for the worse, beyond our control.

In the end, it is the changes for the better that we should remember instead of harping on the sad parts of our lives. Regardless of the changes that we might face, something never do. His love for us will never change, the love that we have for our loved ones will never change. Sure the way we might show it will change from time to time, but the existance of the love lasts for all eternity, as the love that he showers on us.

So that's what I intend to bring to the new year, to 2008. The idea that change, regardless of whether it is from better or for worse, will happen and it is how we choose to face it that defines us.

cheers to the new year.....cheers to 2008...the year of changes

2007-12-21T07:05:00.000-08:00

so I'm back..from outer space...or camp as we know it. yes that was from the song I will survive....just forget it:P

camp was really an eye opener for me. I learnt alot, saw alot, ate quite alot too ( stupid kong guan biscuits, had to try and finish for the commercial:P ) all in all it was pretty fun. Everything went pretty ok despite all the rain, despite all the fatigue, despite everyone fallin sick. You know it's pretty scary when everyone around u looks sick and u don't feel sick at all. Then u start to think..,man there has gotta be something wrong with me. Thank god that everything was fine and basically went well.

u know that no matter how old u are...no matter which sch u go to..some things just nvr change...they will nvr go away...you just have to live with it...no point lettin it get to u :)

thanks for being there for me :)

2007-12-07T08:16:00.000-08:00

stupid incident number ........ there have been so many that I lost count

yesterday I lost the car keys, it's a really REALLY long story so lets leave it at it wasn't one of my more inspiring moments. thank god that there are nice ppl in singapore though

on a lighter note, i spotted this in an article. it is an interesting view on the lives we live :)

Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for , in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and that car and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.
- ellen goodman, boston globe

well but that's life right? the endless cycle of meaningless-ness :P

2007-11-25T04:35:00.000-08:00

this is for all the people that say life sucks:)

u know everyone says that life sucks...and ya sure it definitely sucks. Exams are stressing everyone out, sch is suck a drag, don't have time to do anything that u want anymore, movies are getting worse and worse, shows on television suck, u're not that ideal weight and not even close,teachers suck (right emman?), north korea still has those damn nukes.....and the list goes on. No one can honestly deny that life sucks, no one can say that there is nothing bad is this forsaken world.....

BUT ( u prob saw this comin) despite how much life sucks, there are still good points like the followin..

even though exams stress u out...sch is still great with such awesome friends and classmates. they are what makes sch great

sure movies are gettin worse...but thank god alba isn't dead yet. movies still have some hope there

so what if teachers suck...that's teach less learn yourself for u man:)

well can't do much about the damn nukes...look at it this way...THANK GOD THEY'RE NOT POINTED AT ME

last but not least...I still got u in my life right?:)

so u see...life only sucks as much as u want it to as strange at that might actually sound.

whatever happened to lookin at the bright side of life?

and ppl ask me why I'm so happy all the time....

hmm......

:P

2007-11-17T04:39:00.000-08:00

the absurdity of it all

youth- the true Satunian Reign, the golden age on earth again when figs are grown on thistles, and pigs betailed with whistles and ,wearing silken bristles, live ever in clover, and cows fly over, delivering milk at every door, and Justice never is heard to snore, and every assassin is made a ghost and, howling, is cast into Baltimost

ambrose bierce

2007-11-05T05:19:00.000-08:00

This week has really been a rollercoaster ride, don't really know where to start. this week has basically been pretty awesome for a large variety of reasons. Firstly the term has ended, hols are here, time to have a good rest....I wish:P

lets start somewhere in mid-week. class chalet aside from the lack of sleep...comin late...the really REALLY small space...it was pretty awesome. nvr thought that stoning around and not thinking or worrying about anything would be so fun:) first night slept only 1 hour. I just wasn't tired for some insane reason, could be the mocha I drank while sending cherry off:P spent my time between mahjong ( yes I can play mahjong ), playin halo on small boy's xbox (adrenaline rush ), and just stoning around. basically the 2nd day I conked out, slept for almost half a day. even skipped night cycling:( but well..can't win them all right?

sat was just as awesome, visited mel's church with lois. was remindered of alot of stuff. firstly have u ever realised how small singapore actually is? I know i've said this before but it always amazes me how everyone knows everyone else. everyone is connected in some way or another. maybe it's just the world gettin flatter:P

it is so easy to forget yet so hard to remember...so easy to lose yet so difficult to find...

nothing is impossible for him..no matter how impossible it might actually seem

2007-10-13T20:20:00.000-07:00

Don't Look Back In Anger- Oasis

Slip inside the eye of your mind
Don't you know you might find
A better place to play
You said that you'd once never been
All the things that you've seen
Will slowly fade away

So I start the revolution from my bed
Cos you said the brains I have went to my head
Step outside the summertime's in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
You ain't ever gonna burn my heart out

So Sally can wait, she knows its too late as we're walking on by
Her soul slides away, but don't look back in anger I hear you say

Take me to the place where you go
Where nobody knows if it's night or day
Please don't put your life in the hands
Of a Rock n Roll band
Who'll throw it all away

So I start the revolution from my bed
Cos you said the brains I have went to my head
Step outside the summertime's in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
You ain't ever gonna burn my heart out

So Sally can wait, she knows its too late as we're walking on by
Her soul slides away, but don't look back in anger I hear you say
Don't look back in anger
Don't look back in anger
Don't look back in anger
At least not today

jeux d'enfants

2007-09-28T04:33:00.000-07:00

it is my fault that u miss-interpret everything that I say

it is my fault that u can't get sarcasm

it is my fault that u don't get it

it is my fault that u don't talk to me

it is my fault that u seem immature

it is my fault that u are the subject of this stupid post

it is my fault that u prob won't see this

it is my fault for doing everything that I possibly can

u know what....I've had it...I am not obligated to take this shit anymore...it is not my obligation to do everything I can to make it better..... and have everything thrown right in my face

it takes 2 hands to clap...so I say screw it

I sincerely apologise if my outburst has hurt anybody becuz if it has...well.... we can only do as much as we can to make this world a better place, it's not our obligation to die tryin. if u're reading this and prob think I a talking about u...I am prob not (hear the sigh of relief) whatever I am talking about prob won't even cross your mind becuz it is just not a dan thing. this is what happens when I have my occasional bouts of directed anger. well if u are pretty sure that I am talkin about u, then read carefully and after that forget u ever read this. then we can all go back to our blissful ignorance. isn't that what we want anyway?

One should not lose one's temper unless one is certain of getting more and more angry to the end. William Butler Yeats

...well I am pretty certain that I'm beyond anger...now I just don't care....it feels awesome...u should try it sometime:D

2007-09-17T07:01:00.000-07:00

just a totally random thought that I came across

I know that I have lived because I have felt, and, feeling giving me the knowledge of my existence, I know likewise that I shall exist no more when I shall have ceased to feel.

Giacomo Casanova

It is not the language of painters but the language of nature which one should listen to, the feeling for the things themselves, for reality is more important than the feeling for pictures.

Vincent Van Gogh

2007-08-30T08:37:00.000-07:00

"truth is delusional"

I came across this quote while looking for quotes for the work that jon gave me, and I guess it kinda set me thinking. I have realised that when it comes to life, that is essentially how I treat it, that everything is based on perspective.What is the point of looking at the horrible and depressing world we live in in a negative light? What is the point of mopping around about how much life sucks? If you just looked at the bright side of life, won't you be happier? So I can be delusional about how sad the world is, or I can choose to look it the other way that at least I am better compared to so and so, another delusion.

"truth is subjective"

The truth is, truth differs from person to person. Ironic as that might actually sound, again it is all linked back to perspective. The truth is only as u see it. All the stuff about cold hard facts, it only works if u believe in either the fact, or the process in which that fact came about. An example is the belief that the earth is flat, lets say that I feel that it is a fact. Depending on how strongly I believe in this fact, no matter what photographs u give me from space, I will still deem the proof as unbelievable unless u manage to convince me otherwise. So the fact that the earth is round doesn't matter, what matters is how u convince me that it is round. The truth that comes from the mouth of men is only as true as your ability to convince your listener to believe. Isn't faith simply amazing?

"truth is singular"

There is a singularity in truth, a singularity in belief. If u believe in something, that one belief will stick with you throughout your entire life till u get convinced otherwise. Your faith in that one fact is singular regardless of how many people share it, it is still your own belief and u won't see anything otherwise. Faith in something bigger then yourself, that is what will keep u going. Faith is also the one thing that will change your perspective, change truth as u see it. Faith is what keeps me from looking at the world and going, "if everything sucks so much, I might as well rot my life away".

Maybe as abc puts it, I'm so carefree and heck care about the world because I keep everything bottled up inside. I choose to look at it this way, I decide not to let the world get to me because I BELIEVE that life is only as good....as u choose to view it:D

2007-08-19T07:36:00.000-07:00

And a Man sat alone, drenched deep in sadness. And all the animals drew near to him and said, "We do not like to see you so sad. Ask us for whatever you wish and you shall have it." The Man said, "I want to have good sight." The vulture replied, "You shall have mine." The Man said, "I want to be strong." The jaguar said, "You shall be strong like me." Then the Man said, "I long to know the secrets of the earth." The serpent replied, "I will show them to you." And so it went with all the animals. And when the Man had all the gifts that they could give, he left. Then the owl said to the other animals, "Now the Man knows much, he'll be able to do many things. Suddenly I am afraid." The deer said, "The Man has all that he needs. Now his sadness will stop." But the owl replied, "No. I saw a hole in the Man, deep like a hunger he will never fill. It is what makes him sad and what makes him want. He will go on taking and taking, until one day the World will say, 'I am no more and I have nothing left to give.'"

- Apocalypto

have we demanded too much? will it ever be enough? b

asically some random food for thought that just popped into my head while doing my pw project. It's on the creator of the LiveAid concerts in case u're wondering.

2007-07-30T07:49:00.000-07:00

The Future

according to jo: a rich aristocrat sitting on an arm chair with a cigar in one hand and a beer can in the other, plus a beer belly. 5 kids running around

according to syaz: same thing except instead of a cigar, it's marijuana and as a result minus the beer belly. as a result of drug addiction prob minus the kids too. plus an elec guitar with drug inspired songs

according to me: minus rich( I don't really care, as long as it works out), minus cigar/marijuana( substance abuse is disgusting), minus beer can(preference to mix my own drink), minus 5 kids(family planning), hopefully keeping elec guitar and a pool table like ting's:D

The best-laid plans of mice and men go oft awry- To a Mouse by Robert Burns

2007-07-07T01:36:00.000-07:00

hopelessness...the one thing I dread the most. The creeping feeling that when things start to go wrong, all u can do it just sit back and watch everything fall apart. Knowing that there is nothing on earth that u can do about it. And the one question that pops into your head is why? how can this happen? haven't we done enough? what went wrong?

maybe I am just asking the wrong questions...the right question should be instead what went right? yet when I can't find any answers, the feeling sets in again.

there's got to be a reason why, a reason why everything is good up to the day itself, then the scores just drop......why?

2007-07-05T06:03:00.000-07:00

Drops of Jupiter-Train

Now that she's back in the atmosphere
With drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey
She acts like summer and walks like rain
Reminds me that there's time to change, hey, hey

Since the return from her stay on the moon
She listens like spring and she talks like
June, hey, hey

Tell me did you sail across the sun
Did you make it to the
Milky Way to see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me while you were looking at yourself out there

Now that she's back from that soul vacation
Tracing her way through the constellation, hey, hey
She checks out Mozart while she does tae-bo
Reminds me that there's time to grow, hey, hey

Now that she's back in the atmosphere
I'm afraid that she might think of me as plain ol' Jane
Told a story about a man who is too afraid to fly so he never did land

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
And head back to the Milky Way

And tell me, did Venus blow your mind
Was it everything you wanted to find
And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

Before this I was living my life without plans, living my life day by day, taking whatever life gives me. And now......my head is full of plans- Grey's Anatomy

2007-06-12T07:28:00.000-07:00

how was your lit trip to the uk and france?
when ppl ask me that, I really don't know what to say

What are the sights that u saw?
do I tell them about the Eiffel tower, Versailles, the imperial was museum?
or do I tell them about the 600 graves at the Anglo-Franc war memorial, or the graveyards all over the Somme?

How were the cathedrals in both London and Paris?
do I tell them about Westminster abbey, the tombs of kings or perhaps notre dame, one of the largest cathedrals in the world?
or do I tell them how I can feel god just looking outside my window at the vast green pastures, the beautiful trees and think about how amazing creation actually is?

How were the people in the UK and Paris?
do I tell them about how friendly they are, the excellent service, how please and thank you seems a word that u hear almost everyday?
or do I tell them about how we had to always go out in a group for fear of getting mugged, how sometimes we were afraid to turn left outside of our hotel?

so how was my trip to UK and France? it was memorable....
...... and IT WAS AWESOME:D:D:D:D

2007-05-29T03:14:00.000-07:00

back from pre u sem....and off again for lit trip....
cya everybody in approximately 10 days time:D

it's simply amazing how life just passes u by...how situations...events just fly across your eyes...yet when u want to stop...all that u have to do is just take a step back....find time to just stop and smell the roses....

...things are never that simple

2007-05-17T08:06:00.000-07:00

Something stupid, Incident Number: 3452

Picture this...5 guys...running from Carefour in Suntec...getting lost twice...finally reaching the esplanade concert hall...making it just in time when the bell struck

Now is that something crazy? You haven't heard the best part yet, we were running with flowers in tow.

jh, jj, mft, edo and me were heading for symphonies of voices, vjc choir concert. we met at suntec to grab dinner and to buy flowers for the choir people ( dione and danny) We had to be seated actually at the concert hall by 7.15 , and we only finished picking and buying the flowers at 7.20:P So we decided to make a dash for it. That has got to be one of the most unforgettable experiences in my life. Was exactly like one of those cliche moments in romantic movies, running through crowds with flowers in hand. It was super funny cuz we were running and running and when we ran past a few caucasians, they decided to inspire us with a few cheers, absolutely hilarious.

Thankfully that when we got to the esplanade, the audience was just moving into the concert hall. So we didn't have to be locked outside:) thank god for that!

it's amazing the things that guys will do for flowers....if only flowers were actually bottles of coke....though it would make the whole running thing pretty trivial....lol....

the heart is a bloom....shoots out from the stony ground

2007-05-12T07:34:00.000-07:00

Meant To Live By Switchfoot

Fumbling his confidence
And wondering why the world has passed him by
Hoping that he's bid for more than arguments
And failed attempts to fly, fly

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

Dreaming about Providence
And whether mice or men have second tries
Maybe we've been livin with our eyes half open
Maybe we're bent and broken, broken

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

We want more than this world's got to offer
We want more than this world's got to offer
We want more than the wars of our fathers
And everything inside screams for second life, yeah

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live We were meant to live

sometimes it just takes a few words and a few notes to reflect the feelings of the human heart, when you realise that there are words that are difficult to say, there's prob a song out there that will fit exactly what you are looking for....it's all in the music.....

.....we were meant to live for so much more....have we lost ourselves...

2007-05-02T05:56:00.000-07:00

I think there comes a time when a man must ask himself whether he would want to live a life of happiness or a life of meaning...to be truely happy a man must live absolutely in the present, no thought of what's gone before or what lies ahead. But life of meaning? A man in condemned to wallow in the past and obsess about the future.
-Lindermann, Heroes

so which one shall it be?

on a lighter note, even though I am not a serious soccer fan, the man u/everton match was awesome, 4-2:D

2007-04-20T06:13:00.000-07:00

life has really been really busy for me the past few weeks. everything has just been eventful:D

Last fri was music fest and it was really awesome. All the hard work that we have put in the past few weeks have really made it all worth it. The feeling of playing, the nervousness, the adrenaline rush all makes everything worth it. Even though we didn't win, I really had an awesome time. We lost to vertigo by U2, and since I'm such a big fan of U2, I am basically contented. Thanks for all the support from everybody, really means alot. 07A13 ROCKS:D

Now my time basically consists of school and training. Nationals are in June. I guess the stress is starting to pile up. School work is starting to pile up too. The high points are thankfully at least I am improving in my shooting. In case u guys don't know, I shoot a pistol. Now I got the pistol all to myself as Joshua got a new pistol. Shooting the pistol is really much more fun then shooting a rifle, as fun as shooting can actually get.

This week has really been memorable, stuff has happened that has really allowed me to relook things, certain things that I have actually been taking for granted. Ignorance is only bliss to a certain degree, after that it just gets plain frustrating.

caught in the conflict between his brain and his tongue

2007-03-31T00:09:00.000-07:00

the clock is ticking down...
....2 more weeks

after yesterday, was reminded again of why I am doing this...
....2 more weeks

a proper keyboard
....2 more weeks

stress is building up...
....2 more weeks

months of preparation and
....2 more weeks

it all comes down to this...
....2 more weeks

why do we do...what we do?

2007-03-28T05:11:00.000-07:00

13 Days

" You're a good man; your brother is a good man. I assure you there are other good men. Let us hope the will of good men is enough to counter the terrible strength of this thing that was put in motion." - Dobrynin, USSR Ambassador to USA

" If the sun comes up tomorrow, it is only because of men of good will. That is all there is between us and the devil. " -Kenny O'Donnell

is being good...simply good enough?

2007-03-13T06:02:00.000-07:00

It End Tonight by The All American Rejects

Your subtleties
They strangle me
I can't explain myself at all.
And all the wants
And all the needs
All I don't want to need at all.

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight, It ends tonight.

A falling star
Least I fall alone.
I can't explain what you can't explain.
You're finding things that you didn't know
I look at you with such disdain

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight, It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,It ends tonight.

Now I'm on my own side
It's better than being on your side
It's my fault when you're blind
It's better that I see it through your eyes

All these thoughts locked inside
Now you're the first to know

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,It ends

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,It ends tonight.

Tonight
Insight
When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight.

cheer up...sometimes it just isn't worth it...it ain't over till u say it's over

if u've bothered to read till here, u're in luck cuz I am now gonna make my new year resolution. I will now try my upmost to stop refering to members of the opposite sex as dude . SO if I do actually fail to keep that particular resolution, plz remind me of my mistake by telling me I owe u ice-cream:P

why do I have a bad feeling about this......

2007-03-10T03:19:00.000-08:00

Henry V was talking to his men. He said, " From this day, to the ending ofthe world, we in it shall be remembered. We lucky few, we band of brothers. For he today sheds his blood with me shall be my brother."

2nd Lt. c. Carwood. Lipton, Easy Company, 101st Airbourne Division

in war all men are equal...all men become brothers....a band of brothers...

2007-03-02T22:58:00.000-08:00

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.
Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead,
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East, my West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong.
The stars are not wanted now; put out every one:
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the woods:
For nothing now can ever come to any good.
— W.H. Auden

from 4 weddings and a funeral:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14IvyRxWN9g

recommended by my lit tutor as a must read, recommended by me as a must see. it really doesn't hit u till u watch the guy read it out.

sometimes life doesn't seem worth living anymore, sometimes everything just seems to be for nothing. and as we wait and gaze into the night sky thinking, life just passes us by. u nvr truely understand what u have lost ..... till u have actually lost it.

2007-02-27T06:55:00.000-08:00

just wanted to say HI MUM

2007-02-23T04:39:00.000-08:00

u know there are very few occasions where I actually blog about my life, this will be one of them. Over the past few weeks, I've really had it all. The good...the bad.....and the horribly ugly.

Lets start with the ugly. Have been pretty sick the past 2 weeks, had it really bad on vday for some insane reason. Doc gave me so many meds, it's insane. I have at least 4 different kinds of pills to take and some syrup thing. Well anything beats taking tcm if u know what I mean ( no offense intended) So as a result arc training is basically screwed. I haven't trained for 2 weeks already and it's not becuz I don't want to...there is no way I could possibly attend training:(

CNY was the same as the other years, had lots of fun with cousins from my mum's side..not as much fun with my cousins on my dad's side. I think it's a problem with the age gap, maybe I just can't actually find anything to talk about with my paternal side. I mean come on dude, do u actually want to know how I am doing in school? Will it affect u the next time I see you which will prob be the next CNY? Ignorance is bliss, I don't know and I don't want to know. If not for my grandmother, I will prob not visit u ever again for the rest of my life so seriously can we stop the pretense and get on with our ignorance. I have realised how superficial my relationship with my extended family is. My grand-aunt passed away last year and suddenly we have a whole family less of ppl to visit.

Now at least I am in the pink of health, well at least to attend cross country:P let's just say that I didn't actually "run" for cross country. More of took a little tour with my senior class of east coast park. Our "run" was hilarious, we would walk until we saw a teacher and then start running for show:P Talked so much trash too. I guess coming in the last 100 is quite embarrassing but what the heck, it was fun:D

Now for the totally awesome:D All the practises, all the hours spent have all been worth it. Today was the audition for musicfest and I am quite happy with our audition. We managed to pull it off:) Not sure about the judges views though but I personally feel that we gave it our best and it turned out pretty fine. Hopefully we will make it to the 2nd round, it is out of our hands now.

so these are the highlights of my life in the past few weeks....don't u think quotes are better?

2007-02-11T07:33:00.001-08:00

you know how everyone tells you that being honest is good, simply because it's the truth?

WELL BEING HONEST HONESTLY DOESN'T PAY

sure I know you mean well, I know you want what's best for me. But seriously don't you think you are really being overly paranoid?

using david's words, I have got to be the biggest loser of valentine's week. WTH, VALENTINE'S WEEK HASN'T EVEN STARTED

I am really truely sorry about this, there is no way I could have expected this to happen. I somehow believed that mum will understand, well I guess I was wrong. Really sorry for letting u down again, I promise I will make it up to u dude...somehow

2007-02-09T07:02:00.000-08:00

Welcome To Wherever You Are- Bon Jovi

Maybe we're different, but we're still the same
We all got the blood of Eden, running through our veins
I know sometimes it's hard for you to see
You come between just who you are and who you wanna beI
f you feel alone, and lost and need a friend
Remember every new beginning, is some beginning's end

Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you gotta believe
That right here right now, you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome, to wherever you are

When everybody's in, and you're left out
And you feel your drowning, in a shadow of a doubt
Everyones a miracle in their own way
Just listen to yourself, not what other people say

When it seems you're lost, alone and feeling down
Remember everybody's different
Just take a look around

Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you gotta believe
That right here right now, you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome, to wherever you are

Be who you want to, be who you are
Everyones a hero, everyones a star
When you wanna give up, and your hearts about to break
Remember that you're perfect,
God makes no mistakes

Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you gotta believe
That right here right now, you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome, to wherever you are

2007-02-08T08:53:00.000-08:00

WELCOME TO WHEREVER YOU ARE

2007-02-06T00:27:00.001-08:00

BROWN PENNY- W.B YEATS

I WHISPERED, 'I am too young,'
And then, 'I am old enough';
Wherefore I threw a penny
To find out if I might love.
'Go and love, go and love, young man,
If the lady be young and fair.'
Ah, penny, brown penny, brown penny,
I am looped in the loops of her hair.

O love is the crooked thing,
There is nobody wise enough
To find out all that is in it,
For he would be thinking of love
Till the stars had run away
And the shadows eaten the moon.
Ah, penny, brown penny, brown penny,
One cannot begin it too soon.

is this what age brings?

HAPPY 17 EVERYBODY

2007-01-29T07:19:00.000-08:00

You wake up at Seatac, SFO, LAX. You wake up at o'Hare, Dallas- Fort Worth, BWI, Pacific, Mountain, central. Lose an hour, gain an hour. This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time. You wake up at Air harbour International. If you wake up at a different time, in a different place, could you wake up as a different person?

Fight Club

sometimes we are so caught up with life that we start to change into something totally new. When we realise what is happening, when we look at ourselves in the mirror and see someone else staring back, is it too late?

It is nvr too late

2007-01-25T05:43:00.000-08:00

To those who say people wouldn't look; they wouldn't be interested; they're too complacent, indifferent and insulated, I can only reply. There is, in one reporter's opinion, considerable evidence against that contention. But even if they are right, what have they go to lose? Because if they are right, and this instrument is good for nothing but to entertain, amuse and insulate, than the tube is flickering now and we will soon see that the whole struggle is lose. This instrument can teach, it can illuminate; yes, and it can even inspire. But it can do so only to the extent that humans are determined to use it to those ends. Otherwise it is merely wires and lights in a box.

Edward R. Murrow - Good Night, and Good Luck

now who said spending time in front of a big black box was a waste of time? :P

2007-01-13T05:43:00.000-08:00

et avertens rosea cervice refulsit
ambrosiaeque comae divinum vertice odorem
spiravere, pedes vestis defluxit ad imos
et vera incessu patuit dea

beauty- All the King's Men

2007-01-09T03:14:00.000-08:00

for the past few days, I have been put through what some might call, a right of passage. This right of passage has a name, and thy name is orientation:)

orientation has really been a blast. It has really been all about having fun and meeting new people. my og group is simply awesome. sure doing the first day we hardly said anything to each other, 2nd day only talked within the guys and gals, the og dinner at night really turned things around. soon everyone was talking about close to everything under the singapore sun. made new friends, did the craziest things ( mass dance at suntec ) . and thanks to zi xing ( or should I say violet) , I have a totally new name, I am now hereby called gerald:D plz don't ask me why gerald, suppossedly becuz I look like a gerald, whatever that's supposed to mean.

my class is quite awesome too, pretty nice people. mft is in my class so that kinda helps quite alot. can just barely rem everybody's name, well everything takes time.

CREON-CORSIAR ROX:D

2007-01-03T05:41:00.000-08:00

u know life is really strange and coincidental

just finished 1st day of orientation, super tired out. the strange thing is, I know ALOT of ppl in vj. I know, I know, u must be thinking that it is becuz of the tons of VS guys in vj. frankly speaking, there aren't very much, only approximately 70 of us. k maybe I guess that is quite alot but that is besides the point. there are lots of ppl from my old pri school. in my og alone there's this gal names xinying which I had not seen for like AGES. I think she was in the same class as me at p4 or something, can't really rem. then there are lots of old RMUN mates. lots of ppl I know from some friend's friend that kind of thing. it really is scary.

yet none of the above cathegories appear in my actual og group, k besides xinying, now is that wierd or what? maybe god is telling me I really should go out and meet new ppl.

lol:D

2006-12-31T12:58:00.000-08:00

As the year end draws near, as a new chapter in my life begins, I ask myself what have I done this year? Have I accomplished anything? Have i managed to achiece anything? Have I fulfilled any goal? Honestly, I am not very much of a goal setter. A nice way of saying it is that I like to live life as it comes. A harsher way of saying it is basically I am afraid to set goals for fear of falling. So now as 2006 comes to an end, I ask myself, what have I done?

Lets start with simple things like home. Have become quite accomplished at housework ( not that I particularly enjoy it ) In mar folks during dinner told our family, " hey since u guys are getting older, we have decided to forget that maid and let u kids settle things around the house." so yes that is one thing that I have accomplished. Now I am able to live and care for my own house:) My family has grown closer together now that big bro jon is back from studying. Having 3 bros is really no joke and I must really take my hats off to my mum for raising us. Our house is literally 5 guys and a gal. No matter how angry I might get at my bros ( missed 1st half of manu/reading match cuz dav wanted to watch some tear-eyed movie), they really rock. Great bunch of people, fun to hang out with and really someone that u can count on.

Now on to school, what have I done in school the past year? Started playing in a band this year ( despite Os ) Have grown alot closer to my class in VS, really a great bunch of guys no matter how crazy we might be:D Passed on reigns of 2nd coy to, I hope, a very capable junior. Fulfilled my role as a student by getting the grades. It is amazing how fast time flies. I am now sec4 leaving what has got to be the place I spent a very good 4 years. Had some good times in vs, great teachers who taught me alot about life. The fun, the stupid and the downright crazy, I have really done it all. The Whole VS Experience:D

YE has really been a blast this year. Taking the sec2 guys ( my army ) for BS has really been quite awesome. Despite all the trouble that they cause, the crazy and dumb things that they do ( right darren? ) they are awesome:D I really had fun taking them, sharing my experiences with them. I really hope and pray that u guys have actually learned something the past year and continue to grow in christ. You dudes will always be my little army:D Onto things i have done...played for ye seriously this year, performed at easter, first camp prank ( which was really well done by the way...got the pics to prove it:D ) , made new friends with people I have like never actually talked to before. The sad thing is well, u win some and u lose some. By talking and meeting new people, u tend to neglect your old friends. I haven't talked to what has got to be one of my best friends for a really long time. I guess it is cuz we both have our own commitments and everything, own stuff to settle. It will be good to get together sometime to talk and catch up like over coffee or something.

I bet u're thinking the same thing I am, I feel like i haven't done anything. You know why? the answer is pretty simple, it's becuz I haven't. I have been approaching this whole thing wrong. It is not what I have done, it is not what have I accomplished this year, it is what god has done for me this year. God is the one who brought my family through, god is the one who pulled me through 4 years in VS, god is the one who has opened my eyes to let me see the good in people:D

What have I done this year? Absolutely nothing
What has god done for me? Everything

2006-12-25T23:37:00.000-08:00

HAVE A VERY BLESSED CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY :D

*too stoned to blog anything:P*

2006-12-15T08:54:00.000-08:00

Men are haunted by the vastness of eternity. And so we ask ourselves:will our actions echo across the centuries? Will strangers hear our names long after we are gone, and wonder who we are, how bravely we fought, how fiercely we loves!
- Troy

all men die, but there are few, who have truely lived
- Braveheart

now the question is...how do u want to live your life?

2006-12-13T08:46:00.000-08:00

u know is it simply amazing how the ppl u hang out with can literally turn what would be a boring outing into something totally awesome.

last thurs went to escape, I can even hear the groans in the background. yes i know, like what? ..... escape themepark, a joke of a themepark. surprisingly my outing was really fun. Even though it was raining, had to sit for hours under shelter, rides were wet, still had fun. u know why? cuz I was with the ye ppl:D I tell u those ppl can really make what seems to be a gloomy boring day bright and gloomy. even though I spent like 2 hours in the queue for go kart racing, had some nice talk time with shu, saul and caleb.I am quite sure I will win the bet shu:p it is really amazing how nice the ye ppl are. I mean sure we tease each other once in a while, but deep down u know that u can really count on them in anything.

today u won't believe what I did. I went to tim's house to cook lagsana, make cookies and brownies. just the other week I wouldn't be caught dead doing anything like that. even on my way there I was wondering...what on earth am I doing? but u know what, it turned out to be super fun. Had buying the stuff with lois and tim, learned the names of lots of stuff ( I didn't know there were so many kinds of chedder cheese ) in the end when we got to tim's house, spent so much time talking and basically doing nothing that we forgot about lunch:D cooking with the 2 dudes and one dudette was really fun. sure made lots of mistakes (sorry about the cheese:P), but the food tasted really great. u can ask my mum, brought some cookies back for her to try and she said they were really nice. my mum is a really good cook so when she says something is good it is quite a big deal. so in the end had tons of fun doing something that I nvr thought i would ever do. must be definitely about the company I had don't u think? and like lois said, going for movies and shopping so often does indeed get boring after a while, must do something new:D

life is not about the amounts of breaths u take, it's about the moments that take your breath away-Hitch

2006-12-10T06:01:00.000-08:00

I think your heart grows back bigger you know.once you get the shit beat out of you. And the universe lets your heart expand that way, cause thats the function of all this pain and heartache that you go through and you gotta go through that to come out in a better place.

Jake (Must Love Dogs)

2006-12-08T08:52:00.000-08:00

but the voice of truth
tells me a different story
but the voice of truth
says do not be afraid
but the voice of truth
says this is for my glory
of all the voices calling out to me
I will stop and listen
to the voice of truth

voice of truth-casting crowns

it is so easy to forget...yet so difficult to remember

2006-12-05T23:45:00.000-08:00

u know sometimes I seriously ask myself what is happening
I ask myself why are things like that
why is this happening to me

is it because maybe I infer too much
maybe I look too deeply into things
maybe I try to hard
seeing things that aren't really there

maybe it is because I am afraid of what I see
afraid of what I notice
afraid of what the truth will bring
fearful of being stripped away from my blissful ignorance

well maybe that's just the way it is
just gotta live with it
and dude...if u don't have it..if u don't know how....don't do it
u will just mess things up

the only thing constant about change...is that there will always be...change
change is ultimately...neverending

2006-12-03T22:49:00.000-08:00

if I could live my life again.....

was reading the news today when I came across this question. It set me thinking, if I could relive my life, what would I change? Would I change the many decisions that I have made? Would I make right my mistakes? Would I somehow try to change things to achieve a perfect life?

the truth is, as I look back on my life, I doubt I would want to change anything. There's nothing that I can complain about. Mistakes are what our lives are made up of. They are what makes life worth living. They are what makes us better people. Sure I have regrets, things that I am definitely not happy about. However if I was to change my life, I would definitely be pretty different from the person I am today. Who knows how I could have turned out.

anyway, don't u think that life would be pretty boring if everything was perfect?

:D

2006-11-30T21:36:00.000-08:00

Each circle spins off a circle of its own. Each one seems a new thing but in truth it is not. It is just our most recent attempts to correct old errors, to undo old wrongs done to us and to make up for things we have neglected. In each cycle, we may correct old errors, but I think we make as many new ones. Yet what is our alternative? To commit the same old errors again? Perhaps having the courage to find a better path is having the courage to risk making new mistakes

Robin Hobb- The Golden Fool

makes alot of sense doesn't it......

2006-11-21T21:33:00.000-08:00

lets say that u have a packet of M&Ms
u open it and let it fall into your hand
u don't know what the colour of the M&M will be
sure u know approximately what colour it will be, because M&Ms only have so few colours
yet there is absolutely no way to tell what the colour of the next M&M to drop into you hand will be

life is like a box of chocolates- ruled by Fate

now lets say u have that packet of M&Ms
u know that every piece of chocolate in there is milk chocolate unless of course u decide to buy another flavour
u know that there are only M&Ms in that packet of M&Ms
there is no way that u can find a mars bar in that packet of M&Ms

life is like a box of chocolates- ruled by Circumstance

now lets say u have that packet of M&Ms
u decided to pour the whole packet into a glass bowl because u either have guests over, or u perhaps just like eating it in a bowl
then u are able to choose the colour of your M&Ms
and are only limited by the number of M&Ms of that one colour in your packet
only limited by the number of choices u have

life is like a box of chocolates- ruled by Choice

so I guess the main question is how do u want to live your life, do u want it to be ruled by fate, by circumstance, or by choice.

2006-11-21T21:16:00.000-08:00

I guess life after Os have been lots of fun. My days have pretty much been occupied with jamming with the new band, watching movies, basically hanging out. However somehow I feel like this is the end of any other exam, doesn't really feel like it is the end of O levels. Maybe it is because the reality hasn't really sank in deeply enough with it. I guess I thought I would be going nuts, yet I can't help having this "so what" feeling.

There are pretty much lots of stuff that I want to accomplish before the hols are over and school term starts.

1. learn how to play the guitar properly
2. go swimming everyday:D * or at least as often as possible*
3. get better at keys
4. learn how to use html
5. get better at squash
6. watch every good movie that comes out
7. go for a rock concert, any concert *kinda sad that switchfoot isn't coming:( *
8. improve on my running
9. go for camps:D
10. work on the band
11. hang out more with my sec2s * have kinda neglected them cuz of Os*
12. settle any outstanding complications

so I guess that basically makes up my goals, I probably have lots more, just can't think of them right now:P

2006-11-17T06:36:00.000-08:00

IT'S FINALLY OVER

thats all that I wanted to say...too slack to blog...maybe I'll do it some other time...like tmr:D

and yes lois before u tag....I know I owe u lunch...lol

2006-11-01T04:47:00.000-08:00

ok tmr is the big day, 4 years of education and it all bores down to this. It's kinda sad don't u think that despite all the education one might have, despite all the textbooks u have, nothing teaches u about people better than people themselves:P A friend of mine sent me this email, I think u dudes will like it.

Think before we judge

Question 1:
If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids
already, three who
were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally
retarded, and she had
syphilis, would you
recommend that she have an abortion?

Read the next question before looking at the
response for this one.

Question 2:
It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here
are the facts about the three candidates.

Candidate A.
Associates with crooked politicians, and consults
with astrologists.
He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 Martinis a day.

Candidate B.
He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C
He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be your choice?
Decide first... no peeking, then scroll down for the response.

Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.

Candidate B is Winston Churchill.

Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.

And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion
question: If you said YES, you just killed Beethoven.

Pretty interesting isn't it? Makes a person think
before judging someone.

Wait till you see the end of this note! Keep
reading...

Never be afraid to try something new.

Remember: Amateurs...built the Ark.

Professionals...built the Titanic

And Finally, can you imagine working for a company
that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following
statistics:
* 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
* 7 have been arrested for fraud
* 19 have been accused of writing bad checks
* 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
* 3 have done time for assault
* 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
* 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
* 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
* 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
* 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year...
Can you guess which organization this is?

Give up yet?

It's the 535 members of the United States Congress.
The same group that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of the world in line.

"Man proposes, GOD disposes."

does make u think doesn't it? I guess this email kinda hit me was mainly because I am quite biased against certain things, against certain organisations. And yet I always have this fixed mindset that whoever comes from the organisation is this this this. 1 thing I always tend to forget is that it's the people that make the organisation, not the organisation that makes the people. In the end, who are we to judge?

2006-10-24T03:53:00.000-07:00

Never lie, steal cheat or drink.
But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love.
If you must steal, steal away from bad company.
If you must cheat, cheat death.
And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away.

hitch

2006-10-19T07:51:00.000-07:00

History-disclaimer: this is purely academic :P

Haven't you ever wondered, sometimes why history is written the way it is? What makes up the stuff that you study in textbooks? Have you ever wondered, what would the "bad guys" in history say if they had the chance? Have you ever wondered how history as we know it would have changed if the Axis Powers actually did win World War 2, if Lenin were to suffer the same fate as his brother, arrested and executed by the Okhrana (the tsar's secret police), if Guy Fawkes actually did manage to blow up the house of parliament on the 5th of Nov? Have you ever wondered....

Who writes history, who writes our textbooks, supposedly objective historians? Academics whom have supposedly spent entire lives studying? The truth is, it is the victors who write history. That's what is should be called. Honestly I haven't read a single history books written by the losers (of course that's most probably because they have been wiped out...but that's besides the point) If history is written by the victors, then how objective could it possibly be?

I myself am a student of history, and I have always wondered how much of the history that I study today is actually true. Certain things I guess are just too ambiguous and of course there are the occasional conspiracy theories. (some of them actually make quite a lot of sense) Does history as we know it actually exist, or is it just an elaborate story made up by a bunch of politicians from a different countries who one day came together and said," why don't we just write one big elaborate lie?"

Then of course there are real life accounts, lets forget one moment about how easy it is to actually fabricate a "real life" account. Lets say those claims aren't made up. Have u ever asked yourself, " can I actually believe what I am seeing" ? Have you ever heard the phrase " my eyes deceive me" ? Honestly, men see what they want to see, it all depends on how one interprets it. It is impossible for one to know the broader picture. All a soldier sees are the enemy troops and a hail of bullets, he will never be able to see that his role in a way might lead to lets say, winning the American civil war. Sure he knows the reason why he is fighting, what he is fighting for, but does he ever truly understand?

Have you ever wondered how history can change in 1 second, 1 decision, 1 extra bullet shot? Scientists call it the butterfly effect, a theory that when a butterfly flaps it's wings it can actually lead to a tonado forming off the Caribbean in the near future. If only...if only, life is filled with if onlys, if only Abraham Lincohn stayed home that fateful day, if only Hitler died in prison. Just imagine the implications. Yet everything that has a beginning has an end, time has to go on.

History is no more fixed and dead than the future. The past is no further away than the last breath you took.

What is history but a fable agreed upon- Napoleon Bonaparte

credits: the matrix, fool's errand by robin hobbe, and everyone who has helped in one way or another ( lol )

2006-10-14T20:28:00.000-07:00

I would like to dedicate this post to all the sec4s....classmates from 4E...teachers who have taught me...and ah kong....kidding

this will be my last post on a totally new blog, pretty ironic don't u think?

yesterday was guaduation, frankly I sincerely thought that it was going to just be some crap ceremony, but in the end surprisingly had lots of fun. Everything was very well done. The videos were so heartwarming, especially the one that mdm nabilah did for our class, the day was great. Took lots of photos, quite surprisingly considering that I don't really like having my photograph taken, can't smile properly for nuts. And of course ended the day thanks to khai swimming with the fishes. The whole story is quite hilarious, even though I was quite pissed about it at first, but who cares, it's all in the name of fun:D Luckily managed to rush home for a nice bath, spent like 30 min trying to wash off the damn pond water.

I think my time the I spent in VS will be one of the best years of my life. Did lots of fun stuff from the super fun to the just simply insane. Made lots of good friends and have become indeed a better man. Honestly, VS was not my first choice of sec school, yet I never regretted my decision. There honestly isn't any point going into a school with the attitude that u would much rather be somewhere else, just have to be positive about it, and u will come out just fine:D In vs I honestly experienced the good, the bad and the ugly. Had the ups and downs like every guy. From the co-ed saga, where vs boys grouped together for a common cause, to getting dunked into our school pond. VS has turned me into a gentlemen ( emmanuel calls me a chauvanist for some insane reason ) , a sportsmen (except for running that is which I will always suck at ) and a professional ( at what I am not exactly sure ) . I guess vs has a big part to play in the man I am today. Whether it is for the better or the worst....u tell me:D

Will definitely miss the dudes that I have met in vs, hopefully we will still keep in touch and just maybe, we can have one of those yearly reunions when we will just meet, talk about our wives and get drunk while watching soccer matches.....basically guy stuff :P Wish u all the best in whatever it is that u guys do 4E, will always remember u dudes.

remember..remember...the 13th of october :P what are memories but a figment of our past lives that we try to desperately cling onto

2006-10-13T07:56:00.000-07:00

blog is going through a renovation:D